Does It Work?
To answer the question "Does couples therapy work?", researchers have shown that couples who are MOST satisfied with the results of their couples therapy are the ones who got help and did not put it off.
Couple counseling also works best when both members are interested in making the relationship better.
The Outcome Of Marriage Counseling Is Optimal When
1) The counselor working with the couple has training and expertise in helping distressed couples,
2) The expectations are clear to both parties (even when each member of the couple has different expectations),
3) Both members of the couple are motivated to change,
4) There is/was a foundation of friendship and/or love.
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The Outcome Of Marriage Counseling Is Less Optimal When
1) Couples use the counseling process as a last resort or as a threat,
2) The couples counselor does not have expertise in working with couples in distress,
3) One or both members are only motivated to blame the other,
4) There is little or no prior foundation of friendship and/or love.
Why Do Couples Put Off Counseling?
Some couples know that there is a problem, but cannot get themselves to spend the time or the money on relationship help.
Some couples fear that their counselor will take sides or have a blaming attitude.
For other couples, a tough transition is taking a toll on an otherwise great relationship. They think they can get it back on track on their own. Though sometimes they can, often they need help.
Some people view talking to a counselor as a sign of weakness or failure. Going to couples counseling isn't an admission of defeat, it just means that you want to have a better relationship.
It's important not to wait!
A relationship can spiral down quickly and you may end up doing or saying things that are hard to repair.
Putting off relationship repair can have an effect on your physical health.
Talking to a couples counselor and seeking marriage therapy can help to see the situation in a new way, reduce tensions, and help you reconnect with your partner.